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Abuse is repetitive, and events are reframed by the abuser so targets are made to seem like the problem.

When I confronted my coworker about the issues I was having, he made me feel like the bad guy with responses like, "No one else has a problem with me, so it seems like you're the one with a problem." I started to wonder if there was something wrong with me. STAGE FOUR: Organizational ambivalence The target informs management or Human Recourses, who either steps in and confronts the bully, mediates the situation successfully, or does not help at all. I mentioned to the manager that I was having trouble working with a coworker, and they told me that I needed to learn how to work with people.

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In 2003, Pamela Lutgen-Sandvik defined a cycle of Employee Emotional Abuse (aka bullying).

Here's how that exact cycle played out in real life…

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Some nights, I was so stressed I had trouble sleeping. I had been a great employee; I was even awarded Employee of the Month!After awhile, I became the person who knew the job inside and out, and could do it in my sleep. According to the Workplace Bullying Institute, targets are usually independent, ethical, nurturing, "'go-to' veteran workers to whom new employees turn for guidance." That was me in a nutshell.STAGE FIVE: Isolation Feeling alone, like there is no one to turn to.

Your family and friends, at this point, may even get sick of it and tell you to stop complaining.

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